My wigs found a new home today....

Today my good friend came over with her Mom, sister and daughter to go thru all my wigs, scarves, hats, etc. We tried on a couple of my wigs and they looked so great on her...she is not a redhead but these wigs looked awesome on her! I also gave her all my scarves and hats....These last few weeks I kept looking at the wigs in the bathroom and wondering why I didn't just take them to the American Cancer Society to donate them....was it that I thought that maybe I would need them again?? Now I see that things do happen for a reason and I was so glad to give her all this stuff today. We all went up to the flea market to the wig shop...the ladies there treated her so great and she bought two brown wigs that also looked great. After that we all went out for ice cream...I am so sad that she has to go thru this but I am so glad that we are friends and that I will be able to help her...she is a real trooper!

My herceptin treatment went fine last week..I saw Dr. B. and he said that the insurance was asking for more info before they would cover the Zometa treatment for me so I guess we will just wait and see. The foob seems to still be the same size so I guess I was just imagining that it might be leaking...looks like we are still on for new ta-ta's in November...speaking of ta-ta's...we have over 20 people so far that have said that they will walk with us in the Komen walk in September...how exciting!!

Ok...so there usually isn't anything funny about oncology reports or tests but I read this tonight and just had to share it with you...this is from a real medical report on breast cancer survival...looks like I need to have a few more "spritzers!"

In contrast, the team found that prognosis improved with recent alcohol consumption, with light to moderate drinking reducing the risk of dying by 22 percent.

"The association between alcohol consumption and improved survival is surprising," Barnett commented. "The results of several other studies have not shown such an association."



Not much else to report...summer seems to be going so fast...Jillian will start cheerleading on Tuesday and Tyler starts football next week. Tyler had his physical yesterday and he is 5'6"!!! OMG..my baby is taller than me!! Jillian gets her 5 year shots in the morning...she doesn't know about this yet...she is going to FREAK OUT..it is not going to be a nice start to the week but it has to be done...it's been a good weekend...we have spent a lot of time up at the pool just hanging out with friends...I am thankful for our great friends and the good times we get to spend together...have a good week!

Whew! It's Hot!

Okay, I always knew I hated hot weather but add some drug induced hot flashes on top of that and I am really a wimp...it has been in the 90s here for too many days. It seems like I never cool down but hopefully we will get some relief soon. Bret and Tyler are still working on that crazy shed and the landscaping...4 days of work appears to be turning into 4 weeks of work....

This last week really wore me out...Bret was out of town since last Saturday and it was just such an emotionally draining week to watch my close friend do her first round of chemo, get her port put in, etc. She is pretty overwhelmed with everything but luckily she is at home now recovering from her first round of chemo. My heart just breaks for her...those first days are so overwhelming and she was hit with so much more much faster than I was...I did my best to support her and answer any of her questions but our situations are very different so I have to be careful about that. I think now we have a different bond...it's just different when someone can look at you and say that they understand what you are going thru....I just hope it helps her to not feel alone in this. She has a tough fight ahead of her and I am going to do anything that I can to make that just a little easier if I can.

This week I have another Herceptin treatment...I should also find out if I have been approved for the Zometa treatment...my gut feeling for some reason is that I won't get approved....not sure what that is about. The foobs are fine...sometimes I worry that the one side is leaking VERY SLOW but it's just to darn hard to tell...it just doesn't seem to be sticking out so far into my armpit but maybe it has shifted or maybe I just got used to it being there..the fingernails are a mess...they are just peeling away one by one..that sucks because I have always had such strong nails that grew so fast...I don't know what to do with them at this stage. The hair is still growing and seems to be getting curlier every day. I thought I might have enough to put in a headband yesterday...OMG did it look dumb!! I do not have enough hair for a headband....I am still wearing it in the style that I call the "old man comb-over" but I don't know what else to do...if I push it all back instead of forward I look like Beaker from the Muppets (remember him? crazy red hair all standing straight up!)...that's a look I always was afraid of when I would think about cutting my hair short...now I can have it...great....anyway, I am just thankful every single day for the hair that I do have!!

I am working with my friend Vicki to put together a team for the Komen Race for the Cure in September...the race will be exactly one year from the day that I was diagnosed. This will be my first "cancer event" so I know it will be emotional but I also want to do anything I can to help find a cure...so far we have over 20 people interested in joinging Team Ta-Ta's so I am very excited about that! It should be an awesome day.

Well, enough for now...stay cool!!

I HATE CANCER!!

I don't think I have said that for a while...it's time! I am fine...just sad today. A very close friend was diagnosed with lymphoma...I spent the afternoon at the hospital with her until her family could arrive to be with her. It's just so overwhelming and my heart just aches for her...going thru all the tests, reports, visits with doctors all brought back so many memories....

My friend Kate is doing well after her mastectomy but she will start chemo soon...it's such a scary time...waiting to see how it will be...she is a trooper!

A young Mom (age 35) died this weekend after a hard fought battle with breast cancer...I knew her from my online support group...her 5 year old son's b-day was today...his Mommy should have been there.

Cancer is an evil beast....it just seems like he is turning up too frequently lately...please pray for a cure and for those that fight the battle......

Maybe a new treatment??

So I am finally sitting down to write about my appt. with Dr. B. last week. This was a 3 month follow up....wow, it is kind of cool to only be seeing him every three months now!!! I asked him about a new study I saw on the drug Zometa...this is a drug that originally started being used for patients with bone loss and then they started using it for cancer patients that had progression into their bones. Now there are studies out showing that this drug also has benefits for early stage BC patients to help prevent recurrence. I don't think he was surprised by me bringing this up...he knows how I do my research. He had just returned from the big oncology conference in Chicago and he said there was a great deal of discussion about this. He said he would be willing to give me this treatment if the insurance would approve it...it is a 15 minute infusion given every six months for three years....the good news is that it really doesn't have any major side effects...there are some odd things that happen VERY rarely but I won't even go there. Now we just have to see what the insurance says...I hope I get approved...any thing that improves my chances of not having a recurrence is great. We talked about the swelling I was having in my feet but he wasn't too concerned about that since it is not in my legs...just said to keep an eye on it. Overall, he said that I am doing great! I told him that there are actually days that I feel almost normal again. He seemed so glad to hear me say that....he told me that when he decided to change fields and become an Oncologist that he hoped that he would be able to help his patients get thru their treatment and then get back to their lives...he said he knows that all cancer patients have some level of fear of recurrence but that he hoped he could help his patients move forward.....what a wonderful thing to hear a doctor say!! This shows that he doesn't just look at his patients as a disease...he sees them for the people that they are...he treats us as people....we are so lucky to have him as a doctor!!

I will get my MUGA results when I go for my next treatment....it took 2 people to get the IV in this time...the second person they called in was the woman that was with me when they did the injection for the sentinal node....that was by far the most painful procedure I have ever had in my life but she was such an angel....she held my hand, prayed for me and even kissed my forehead when I was crying. As she was trying to get the IV in I told her how much I appreciated how good she was to me back in September on that horrible day. We talked for quite a while and she told me how much she loves her job and helping people....again, the patients that see her are very lucky!! She finally got the needle in and we hugged and said goodbye...the test went fine...it just stinks that they are not able to access my port for these tests. I forgot to mention that Dr. B. looked at my port and said "when are we getting rid of this thing??" I told him that I was thinking we would take it out when I had my exchange surgery in November...he said that sounded like a good plan and then he said "you are never going to need that thing again"....I love his optimism!!!

Catching up...

Well, I guess I went to bed too early last night because here I am at 4:00 am...in the last 2 days I worked about 23 hours...that is way more than I am used to doing these days so it really took it's toll. On top of that I was "entertaining" customers and always being "on" really seems to cause you to exert a great deal more energy....anyway - it all went well but again I was glad to see them to the front door and on their way back to PA!

Our weekend was great. Tyler and Bret decided to stay home to attend the big Strawberry Hill 4th of July party and then build our new shed. It's a great looking shed that said it would take 2 men approx. 4-5 hours to install. They started on Saturday and just finished with the roof last night...yikes...I think I am even more glad that I was out of town. I feel bad for Tyler...he didn't have much of a fun weekend but I think he enjoyed spending that time with Bret.

Jillian and I enjoyed spending time with everyone at Mohican. If you have not been there I will tell you that it is very peaceful and remote...no cell phones, no newspapers....just peaceful. I had forgotten how beautiful it is to look out over the hills and the lake. We really had nice weather. We went to see a great fireworks display on Friday night, spent most of our time during the day around the pool and in the evenings we all gathered around the fire pit to make s'mores - yummy! It's just nice to have all of our family there...and extended family (friends) and see everyone come together in the evenings to laugh and just spent quality time together - these are the good things in life!!! Jillian was actually on pretty good behavior for the majority of the trip...Kay and Amanda helped out with her a bunch so I think they were able to help diffuse some potential meltdowns. We were up late every night and up early in the mornings so by the time we got home on Sunday I was dead tired...I fell asleep at 6:30 and woke up at 6:45 on Monday....guess my body is still trying to get it's strength back.....

The Mohican area has a lot of special memories for me....when I was in Junior High and High School we used to go to Church Camp just over the hill from the resort. We almost always went in January...BBrrrr. Early in the mornings we would bundle up and hike over the hill to the resort...maybe it was a mountain...sure felt like it. Once we were at the resort we could swim, play in the game room and just run crazy in the place because there was never really anyone there at that time of year....then we would pack up, bundle up and head up and over the hill again to get back to camp. Any time I am there now I enjoy remembering all those times being there as a kid....

Foobs are doing just fine...still rock hard but each day a little less sore...
Hair seems to be coming in faster...I am more comfortable now being out "uncovered" and don't notice so many people staring at me....

Today I go for another MUGA (heart test) to be sure that the Herceptin is not damaging my heart...let's hope for good results!! I had a great visit with Dr. B. last week...will write more about that later...think I will try to get a little more sleep in before work...have a good day!

Tired..

Just wanted to write a quick entry...I am almost too tired to type tonight. Jillian and I met my family at Mohican State Park over the 4th. It was a good trip...we got back Sunday afternoon and now work has been crazy these last two days because we had customers in for training.

Sue-Glad to hear you had a great b-day on the 4th...what was this 33? 34?? !!!

I will write more when I can catch up on some ZZZzzzz's!!

The next step....

Well, I did go to work "uncovered" yesterday and it was fine...everyone was very nice about it..Bret took some new pics last night so you can see the new "do"...wow, I really do have a BIG forehead...I always thought that but this new hair really shows it off!

Each one of these steps really are difficult...this disease pushes you so far emotionally and it just seems to never end.....